


trouble is paradise

by oneishaa97



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: 2x17 drabbles, Angst, Lies, Love, M/M, Malec, Malec are fighting, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 06:32:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11549487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneishaa97/pseuds/oneishaa97
Summary: "You looked me straight in the eye and lied"A small drabble for the little Malec (emphasis on the little) scene we saw in next week's promo.





	trouble is paradise

_Magnus_

 

_We need to talk_

 

"It's probably nothing," Isabelle sighed, trying her earnest to reassure her brother but Alec, being Alec, was over thinking it, overanalyzing Magnus' every word, every stroke of every letter in that iMessage.

 

_Talk?_

_That doesn’t sound good at all_

 

Alec frowns, a deep crinkle appearing between his eyebrows. Isabelle sighed again, clearly very frustrated by Alec's demeanor and smoothens it out with her perfectly manicured fingers.

"Just go see your boyfriend, Alec. He probably just had a stressful time with the Seelie Queen. You know how manipulative that wench is. Remember what happened with Jace and Clary? Go, I'll keep watch here."

Alec nodded, albeit reluctantly, but pushed himself to his feet, he throws his jacket over his shoulder and gives Izzy a quick nod and small smile before making his way to the exit.

 

_What if he found out?_

_What if he's just tired of dating me and wants to break up?_

_What if the Seelie Queen showed him me in the next twenty years and he's decided he doesn't want me looking like that when he hasn’t aged in the slightest?_

_What do I do then? How do I take it?_

_Should I smile and politely offer to still be friends? Or completely lash out and call him out on his selfishness._

 

Scary thoughts loop around in my mind until I feel myself almost — _almost_ believing it.

I didn't even notice when I'd gotten to Magnus' loft. I had been so preoccupied on convincing myself that everything was fine that I didn't even realize until I was standing in front of his door, raising my hand to knock sharply at his door.

 

_Shit!_

_Here goes nothing..._

 

The door opens on its own and I stare at the wooden door incredulously before gathering that it was obviously Magnus' magic. _Duh Alec! Idiot_

"Alexander." His voice sounds cold and not like he usually sounded at all. I hear him before I even see him. It's like he's all around me. Atleast he sounds that way.

I forced my legs to move and walked further into the house. He stood hunched over the small table he keeps some of his alcoholic beverages on. He's mixing something — something purple and sweet. He turns to face me and I almost swallow my tongue. His hair is disheveled like he's ran his fingers through it in frustration so many times. I flinched remembering how he yanked his hair out when I had asked for his DNA, how he had ordered me out of his house. I knew he was upset then but right now... I don't know what expression he wears on his face. He's stoic but somehow gentle. He looks hurt and I immediately started combing through my brain, trying to find what I might have done this week to hurt him but I came out empty handed. I hadn't done anything.

"Hey Magnus," I say, forcing a smile onto my face. He doesn't smile and now I'm really, really concerned.

"Magnus?"

Magnus turns, almost too slowly to be real.

"How'd it go with the Seelie Queen?"

That did it. His eyes snapped up, instantly harden. I took a step back without even meaning to.

His eyes were giving a glare that felt like it was freezing my bones, like being nude in the middle of a hailstorm, where every chunk of ice was a frosted dagger cutting into my skin.

Magnus turned back to resume mixing his drink. With his drink in hand, he turned to face his boyfriend.

"She showed me something."

I waited.

"Something that I had trouble believing at first," he said in the same cold tone, stirring up the beverage with his pinkie finger.

"What did you see?" I asked in a whisper. Cursing myself for how weak and pathetic I sounded even to my ears.

Magnus walked over to his sofa and sat slowly. He patted the empty spot next to him and immediately I went towards him, sitting beside my warlock. Not too closely though, I could practically feel heat radiating off him.

"Do you trust me, Alexander?"

In that minute his glamour dropped. Magnus' eyes were green but not the kind of shade that's easy to describe. It was almost like they were both green and yellow at the same time, with black creeping in around the edges as if it were trying to take over. He blinked and the beauty was momentarily covered by the shield of his eyelashes; naturally long and soft looking — feminine compared to the rest of his well-structured features.

"I...what? Of course, I trust you Magnus. Why wouldn't I?"

Magnus scoffed, rising to his feet.

I frowned. My heart slammed against my chest.

_I didn’t understand_

"Magnus —"

"You looked me straight in the eye and lied."

I blanched. I could feel my pulse throbbing in the temple.

_What did I even lie about?_

"Magnus —"

"You told me that the Clave was in possession of the Soul Sword. You swore that you'd see it with own eyes but I found that to be untruth. I don't except you to tell me everything about your job because I know you can't but the Soul Sword concerns _me_. It concerns the downworlders! My people. It could kill us all quite easily."

Cold sweat glistened on my furrowed brow. With hands clasped tightly in front of my stomach I constantly fiddled with my knuckles, weaving my fingers in and out of each other.

I shook my head almost in disbelief. _Why did I even think he wouldn't find out? This was Magnus Bane. Of course, he'd eventually find out everything dark, murky secret._

"I'm sorry, Magnus. I-I couldn't. I made a promise. I couldn't discuss with anyone —"

"I'm not _anyone_ , Alec!"

Magnus ran his hand through his hair three times in quick succession and fixed me a stare that could have frozen the Pacific. He snarled more than spoke.

"I'm a warlock, a downworlder. You may have seen the downworld, Alec but you don't live it. Do you know what could happen if word gets out. Weren't you thinking about that? Of any of that? I could've walked out of my loft any day and died without even knowing why or how because you didn't think I deserved to know that some hot headed downworlder hater has the sword that could wipe out my very existent."

My gaze dropped to ground and hooked I hooked my thumbs through my jeans.

I hadn't even thought about it like that. I didn't _want_ to think about it like that. Magnus leaving for work or him just coming by the institute to meet me and suddenly struck down by a nephilim that wanted him dead.

I felt sick.

"This isn't going to work," Magnus said softly; his usually sharp and commanding voice now barely audible.

Regret washed over me like the long slow waves on a shallow beach. Each wave was icy cold and sent shivers down my spine. How I longed to go back and take a different path, but now that was impossible. There was no way back.

_How the hell do I fix this?_

"Magnus," I tried, praying for something anything to say but I came up blank.

_Just my dumb luck!_

"I love you."

"Would you stop saying that?" Magnus yelled, getting closer to me. He was seething. His unglamored eyes made him seem like a completely different person. I wasn't afraid of them or him but I was afraid of what his anger would make him say.

I worried he’d say something he couldn’t take back something that I didn’t want to hear.

I flinched, taking a step back but he was right on my heel.

"Every time you completely mess up you come in here, say you love me then except everything to be alright. Well nothing is alright, Alec. Look, I get it. There are some stuff you can't discuss being the head of the institute and all. I understand. I wouldn't ask you to give that up just like you can't ask me to give up my warlock abilities because that makes us who are but if you can't trust me and try to be a little better with your approach to things how can this work? How can I be with you?" His last words broke off, his eyes filled with unshed tears and his hands trembled, slightly shaking up the beverage he had yet to taste.

"This isn't going to work," he repeated, finally taking a sip of the drink he'd been holding the entire time.

"We can't, Alec. It's just not going to work out between us."

“I’ll do better by you, Magnus. I promise, I’ll tell you everything just please.”

Magnus shook his head.

“Not like this. I didn’t want you to have to tell me something this important because I threaten you with a breakup I want you to be able to tell me things because you want to – because you trust me but you don’t trust me, not right now and I’m not sure when you will or if you ever will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Malec is my heart & soul but I also want to see a bit more than casual two seconds kisses. I want them to have fights because that make up sex will be fire!!!!


End file.
